Monday, 10 October 2016

Everyday News by Kofi Mensah

Everyday News

Sitting overdosing on pointless information. 
Anxiety at an all time high.
Too stressed to leave the house for fear of not 
understanding my mobile on my return.
They have upgraded me. I didn't ask them to and 
what have I done to deserve this promotion?

Checked my emails that are telling me I need to Link-In 
to this Africa, that Africa, Afronauts on the moon 
want to connect and am I interested?
I need to revise my thinking on Word for Windows, 
as it too, has been upgraded and would I like a new 
password as the old one is far too obvious? 

"Open Sesame".....

My Apple is writing me notes. 
I haven't been on iTunes enough so they are 
considering whether or not they want to 
keep me as one of their loyal customers. 
My Kindle has given up on me even though it has a full battery.
Amazon Pride is not being offered to the likes of me. 
Ebay have blocked me for virtually stealing one of their jokes. 
My Supermarket reward card has been cancelled 
and all my points have been donated to those 
far more worthy than myself. 
My line rental is all but expired and I am having 
serious doubts if I actually want to continue at all.....

Notes flying through my letterbox, 
indicating that I am some kind of moron
for not switching my energy supplier.
A handwritten letter thrown on my welcome mat 
from a Church up the road,
with the news saying that they are all praying 
for my soul this coming Sunday.

Meals on wheels left me a message to get in contact 
and would I like to feed the 5000 and
some little fucker has pushed a plastic bag through my window telling me to fill it up for some starving child in Portugal...
Little did they know, I have sent all my spare change
to save an old donkey in Brazil.

Kofi Mensah, 10/10/2016

No comments: